Raising the Future
Being a part of raising the next generation is such a gift. Some even say these tiny humans are gifts from God himself! They couldn’t be any more spot on either and hopefully these words can help inspire you to reach for new levels in your adventures of raising the future.
…Laying It All Out…
I am pretty sure children are born already wired with the ability to find the most creative ways to test and challenge every part of us - mind, body AND soul. I know mine have kept me up all hours of the night and have thrown the most epic tantrums with the worst possible timing. They also seem to be super expensive, somehow already created with a built-in feature to have a knack for testing everything’s durability. I don’t even know how to explain the amount of time and energy they require to raise, teach and keep safe - I swear my youngest believes it’s his mission to be the next Evil Knievel, some mad scientist or maybe even a Houdini style ninja.
But with all the jokes aside, clearly it can be super easy to fall victim to the mentality of viewing these tiny beings as something happening to us rather than seeing the gifts that they truly are - as I have just demonstrated. Having three children myself and living in the same world as all of you, I too have been a victim of this mentality. I too have struggled to see their gifts at times, instead only seeing the exhaustion, mess and frustrations. And it doesn’t help any of us when our society seems to have this massive list of impossible things we need to be, do or have in order to be labeled as a good parent. This society not only encourages us to compete against one another for meaningless titles but it’s sometimes cool to call out or talk down those who don’t follow the grain, who don’t buy into the hype or choose not to subject their children to the many broken systems we have in place today.
But what if we shift that mentality? What if we take all of those expectations and judgements to the garbage where they belong. We can change how we do that and it’s one of the first steps in changing how all of our paths are going right now.
…Shifting Your Thinking….
Instead of it being part of the “grow up, get married and have kids” obligation that society imparts on us with it’s endless supply of unrealistic expectations, what if it was about receiving a wonderful opportunity to reconnect to our creator and purpose, to learn and grow, and to see the world in a whole different light? What if it was about the privilege and honor of raising the future, trusting that they were designed perfectly the way they are and already come with so much love, joy and curiosity built inside of them? Maybe then we would be able to confidently create the environment they need to follow their own passions and desires, raising them in a way more suitable for their needs and not society’s or even our own.
Have you ever noticed how these amazing, little souls come to us at a time when we actually need them? It’s almost as if they were sent here at just the right time to remind us of who we once were, to encourage us to dig deep and reassess our current paths, and to wake us up. And of course, it’s usually when we are so lost ourselves we may not even realize it.
You see, every human comes into this world 100% authentic and full of life, optimism, love, joy, and curiosity. It’s so amazing how these tiny humans are capable of so much love, can so easily forgive or let go of things, and can absorb so much knowledge. Then the world happens and our social environment, families and communities begin to chip away at that authenticity in order to fit into whatever mold is necessary to be ‘successful’. Over time we move away from our own authenticity to becoming just the right person this world thinks they need. One who is really good at following others people’s impossible demands and expectations. One who is able to sacrifice their own needs to serve other’s first, usually at the expense of their own needs. We become people who create lives built upon what other people think we should be doing instead of following the path that was true for us from the beginning. And we did all of that because we were just kids ourselves looking to for love so we could learn and grow.
Consider this… a child will choose attachment over their own authenticity every time. If they don’t, they may get hurt, be left out, or not get the love they need to grow. They are sponges and will adapt to whatever environment they are in, changing the very essence of who they are in order to get the love they think they need to grow. It’s basic nature.
As their parents, it is our responsibility is to help them maintain that zest for life, shower them with love and raise them up to be strong, grounded humans that know who they are, what their purpose is and how special their own gifts are not only for themselves, but the world around them too.
…With That, A Proposal…
I propose that we start by raising the future from a place of gratitude - by appreciating and honoring the beautiful gift that they bring to us. A new, fresh perspective that chooses to operate from a place of love and light instead of the darkness and hurt so many of us experience as adults today. I invite you to let them lead you and wander in their footsteps. Through the eyes of a child, this world is amazing! It’s expansive, wondrous, abundant with life and has so many adventures to explore, solutions to discover and hearts to love.
We can continue by allowing them to open our own hearts and teach US how to love again, how to be curious again, and how to be human again! If we can see what a blessing these children are and how magnificent their abilities to love, forgive and wonder are - then how can we facilitate an environment that allows them to blossom and thrive? What can we do to help cultivate their desire to grow and nurture their passion to create? How can we promote hearts filled with compassion and gratitude? How can we raise the future to grow this world into something better tomorrow than it is today?
…Creating A New Environment…
We do that by building strong roots and a solid foundation at home, grounded in knowing who they are and how they fit so beautifully in this world. This world is working overtime to burn our own worlds down these days, so having a strong foundation at home is an essential safe place for them to reflect and evaluate their options.
Helping them branch out to find resources for their own paths and teach them where to go for help when they need it - that’s how we help them look for the answers to the bazillion questions have. We find them a safe and loving community that both encourages and challenges them, showing them how to rise up above the muck and stay true to who they are. We teach them of the beauty inside and outside of them and how we are all connected. And most importantly, we love them. We shower them with so much love and light so they may become beacons of love and light themselves!
We also support and encouraging the gifts they were given to bring light back into this world. If they want to dance and paint, put on some music and get them the tools. If they think they’re tiny scientists, build them a lab and get them things to explore. You see, we’ve all been doing this already from the moment they were born….when they showed signs of wanting to walk, we got them time along the couches and held their hands while walking all over the house and outside with them. When they stared at our food and wanted to eat it, we put them in a high chair and gave them some food to explore. Once the time came for them to want to ride a bike, we put them on one and gave them time to practice. Each time they fell, we helped them back up and encouraged them to keep trying.
As parents, we already know how to help our children learn and grown - we were beautifully designed with these abilities and we have been doing it since they were born! But, sometime around age 3/4 we are told we don’t know how to teach them and they must go to a school to learn. We are given all these milestones for them to meet that line up so conveniently with the structure of that school. If they fall behind, then we are told something is wrong with them. No more!
Let’s switch our view on parenting to a mentality of co-learning and co-creating a beautiful place for all of us to thrive.
Let’s raise the future with so much gratitude, love and wonder!
